DR. Wiseass FAQ's

Recently, after a 6 ½ year hiatus from the Lyme community – DR. Wiseass courageously reappeared, unveiling her NEW site http://drwiseass.com in the process.    Prior to her abrupt departure from the ‘community’ in 2007 – she had been quite a prolific blogger at www.twistoflyme.blogspot.com .    While DR Wiseass feels the posts & personal information shared on both of these sites should be a sufficient  explanation as to "WHO SHE IS" and "WHAT SHE'S ALL ABOUT"  – she has be inundated on her own Facebook page with repetitive questioning, which people feel they have the RIGHT to know.  So without further ado… the FAQ’s:

   
1)   Who IS DR Wiseass?

DR Wiseass is the pseudonym of an older gal suffering with chronic invisible illness for the greater part of her life.  She was diagnosed with Lyme disease in November 2004, and decided in 2005 to start a blog as a vehicle to work through her own struggles, as well as triumphs with this most insidious disease.  She chose to keep her true identity anonymous because:

• A) She likes to write about her in-laws.  No one in their right mind would  openly make jokes about their in-laws using their real damn name!  DUH!

• B) At one brief (stressful) point in time,  using her real name, she was quite a vocal advocate in the Lyme community, and found it most necessary to keep the distinction between her real  identity and her ‘say-ANYTHING’ pseudonym.  She’s smart enough to know some people either don’t understand or “can’t handle” her satirical, sometimes raunchy sense of humor, so she quite wisely has kept both identities separate. 

• C) It’s her username on Lyme disease message board.  While there are so many good people helping out on most message boards, she also knows there are also some very strange folks on there too.  In this techno day & age where one’s name & home address  are linked for anyone to see  – DR. Wiseass  KNOWS better than to reveal her true identity …at least NOT with her loud mouthed propensity toward speaking the truth….often with MUCH profanity!

• D) It’s her pseudonym; her “gimmick”; her “brand” in which she delivers her own unique brand of humor. 

2)  OK, but WHO is DR Wiseass?  What’s her REAL NAME?

DR. Wiseass is the pseudonym of a humorous blogger that often enjoys using satire & sarcasm to get her points across.   She employs a pseudonym for her comical writing style because she would never want to hurt the feelings of her family & friends, even though they sometimes do the most comical (stupid) things. 

DR. Wiseass uses an anonymous pseudonym because it also allows her to be more honest & often truly ‘vulnerable’ with regards to her experience as a patient with chronic invisible illness – knowing much too well the day-to-day struggle and cruel injustices heaped upon chronic Lyme disease patients.  

3)  But I NEED to know WHO she really is!  So WHO is she?

DR Wiseass understands first-hand the over-whelming frustration of brain-fog, as it is a common feature – an overlapping symptom – of many chronic invisible illnesses.  Because of this, she invites you to return on a different day when, perhaps, the ‘fog has lifted’ and you can better understand that which has already been presented repeatedly. 

 4)  But it’s my RIGHT to know who she is!

DR. Wiseass wonders if, during your childhood, you were not told “NO” very often.  Going on that premise, she gently & with compassion welcomes you to the world of adults when she says:

                   NO.  NO, it isn’t your RIGHT to know. 

You DO have a RIGHT to pursue happiness, and if you can’t be happy with DR Wiseass’s brand of humor while respecting her RIGHT to privacy – then you are ENCOURAGED to seek happiness & LAUGHTER elsewhere.  Anger, even a sense of “righteous anger” that many with chronic illness experience is really NOT conducive to healing.  DR. Wiseass wants you to find a place where you may comfortably laugh your ass off.!  And YES, even YOU – even though you ‘ve been rather mean & uninviting to her. 

 

5)  I’m a blogger too.  I’ve been writing for YEARS, and I’ve never felt the need to HIDE behind a pseudynm!  I don’t think there’s any accountability when writing under a pseudonym! 

Hmmm…   DR. Wiseass does find this to be an interesting, and possibly a valid point – to some degree.  However, she doesn’t feel that utilizing a pseudonym and refusing to give in to the demands of others to be  equivalent to “hiding”:

•  A)  Thanks to YEARS upon YEARS in therapy, DR. Wiseass knows that when people are angry, especially if they are part of a gang mentality, or are engaged in that popular past-time called “cyber-bullying” – they are actually incapable of understanding logical presentations,  for they are operating out of their ‘animal brain’ – their limbic system.  DR Wiseass knows those that are angry are better dealt with at a later time.  Therefore - if DR. Wiseass refuses to answer you – it is often because she is sleeping; at the pharmacy; in the bathroom; writing blog posts; spending time with her family; OR because she doesn’t think any answer she provides you with will be satisfactory to you, and therefore, deems her time too important to waste in attempting such.  

• B)  As far as writing is concerned, DR. Wiseass wonders if your inability to understand her choice to maintain anonymity via a pseudonym is because you assume your writing styles are the same.    They are not.

•  C)  IF DR. Wiseass is indeed, ‘hiding’ at all, it is actually for the benefit of her offspring, who just might want to be President of the United States one day – or NOT.  Either way, the anonymity chosen by DR. Wiseass is meant to assure nothing she says or writes ever reflects badly upon her child(ren).

6)  I still think she’s just HIDING.  I don’t trust people who hide. Why should I TRUST her?

YOU SHOULDN'T!  In fact, you probably shouldn’t TRUST most of the people you’ve “friended” on your Facebook page.   DR. Wiseass feels trust should be earned.  That’s why DR. Wiseass isn’t trying to seek donations from you, date you, stalk you, or sell you anything.  Instead, DR. Wiseass was simply seeking your cyber-friendship out of a sense of community.  

IF, in spite of her “opening up” to everyone via her NEW and OLD blog sites mentioned above - if you continue to feel unsettled by DR. Wiseass’s anonymity – by all means “unfriend” her OR don’t accept her friendship to begin with.   Ultimately, it is your choice, which DR. Wiseass certainly respects; and she wishes you well as you go on your way.

 7)  Well why is she so SARCASTIC?  I think SARCASM can be RUDE!

You don’t get the comedy channel,  do you? 

Most individuals who aspire to comedy at any level (regardless of whether YOU find them funny) utilize sarcasm to some degree.  Most of the time when DR. Wiseass is using sarcasm, she is attempting to be funny.  HOWEVER, there are, indeed, times DR. Wiseass uses sarcasm INSTEAD of saying or writing what she may truly WANT to say because she doesn’t want to be as rude and inappropriate as she’s certainly capable of being.  In other words, her sarcasm is a gift which she shares with you – regardless the reason.   You may choose to take offense, if you’d like.  Again, that’s YOUR choice.

 8)  I don’t think SARCASM is funny.  I think it’s hurtful.

DR. Wiseass understands many people will not understand her special brand of humor.  In such circumstances, she ENCOURAGES you to GO AWAY, for it is not her desire to be hurtful to anyone. 

 9)  Well I’ve heard BAD things about her from some of my friends;  is she BAD?

In response to the 1^st part – your friends must not really know DR. Wiseass very well, as DR. Wiseass is certainly not familiar with your friends.   Furthermore, DR. Wiseass feels it is probably  best we keep it that way. 

Regarding part 2 of your question:  Define “bad”.

10)  I still think she needs to PROVE to me she’s a Lyme disease patient.     How do I KNOW?

DR. Wiseass feels it would be an unnecessary inconvenience, as well as an invasion of privacy to have to hunt down her Western Blot results from Igenex labs to prove  her Lyme disease diagnosis, or any other diagnosis to anyone on a website.   Besides,  Lyme disease is a clinical diagnosis and the various LLMD’s she has seen over the years are currently unavailable for comment. 

  

11)  I still think I DESERVE to know who she is.  Why can’t she tell me in a private message? 

Due to DR. Wiseass’s ongoing physical illness, she tires quite easily.  At this point, she would like to convey how very fatigued she has become by these incomprehensible questions, and finds your obsession with her identity a bit disturbing.  Furthermore, she would like to suggest you find a new hobby, watch a little television, or perhaps give yourself a much-needed enema.

12) Why does she talk or write about herself in 3^rd person?  I think that’s creepy. 

DR. Wiseass is disheartened to think anyone would judge her writing style as ‘creepy’. 

…but that whole 3^rd person thing is weird, isn’t it?

13)  OK, well one other thing….

NO!

I do so hope these FAQs help answer the incessant questions which have recently been posted by several individuals on my Facebook site: https://www.facebook.com/dr.wiseass.1, as I am quite finished with this conversation.  It is now both my hope & intention to spend my valuable "operational" time writing about the hardships & triumphs faced by those with chronic invisible illness.  But then, maybe I just did.  

Until next time...

Hugs & Kisses,

DR. Wiseass

~NOT a real doc; just a real wise ASS!