MISERY'S COMPANY

"Misery loves company" – at least that’s how the old adage goes.   At one point in time, I’m not sure I really understood such a gloomy sentiment.  Then, I got sick….(again and AGAIN)…and for a really long time.    It was then that I finally understood what it truly means  to feel miserable – to experience a true level of misery.  And with that misery, came this strange compulsion to start a blog.

As for my reason to blog, I've come to believe that along with physical symptoms, chronic illness provides a bevy of mental & emotional bullshit to work through.  The very act of being chronically ill can tend to make most people feel lonely, isolated, misunderstood, and just a little depressed...or often times -  A LOT depressed.


To work through all those feelings, it helps to "tell our stories".   But for the chronically ill - the people to tell these stories to becomes fewer and fewer by the day - because let's face it - sick folks just aren't much fun to be around.  In fact, much of the time other people tend to think of us as big party-poopers.  And for those of us whose illness involves the beloved colon - sometimes we can literally be...party poopers.   And if you've ever pooped rather unexpectedly and publicly, at a party or elsewhere, the number of human beings willing to admit even knowing your name dwindles quite dramatically.  Why?  Because sometimes healthy people and/or those with no significant problems can be just too damn judgmental!

Being judged is one of the many emotional components of being “sick” that really seems unnecessary and unfair. The realization that you are being judged by your family, your friends (if you can keep them), and society in general just adds insult to injury. 

Honestly, it takes work to maintain a good relationship with someone whom is chronically ill for one reason or another.  Unfortunately these days, most people don’t have the time nor desire to invest that must work in relationships – at least not from my experience.  And while I am so grateful for the precious relationships that have held strong during this most challenging time in my life, I also realize that those precious people - my husband, my daughter, my parents, and a couple of “soul sisters” - they can only hear my melodramatic stories of woe so many times before wanting to shove a sock in my throat.  

SO - that’s why I need to write.  I MUST write because “sick” people need support, too.  And for whatever reason, it can sometimes feel like having a secret support system by sharing that common element of misery with others. It’s a strange, unifying factor. 

The great poet & writer, Maya Angelou, said:

  "There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you."

What profound truth that is!  It reminds me of the quote by Jesus in the Gospel of Thomas that states:

 "If you bring forth what is within you, what you bring forth will save you.  If you do not bring forth what is within you, what you do not bring forth will destroy you."

Frankly, I’ve got too much microbial bullshit trying to kill my ass as is, so I certainly don’t need to choke to death on my own unspoken or unwritten words!  So with that in mind, I now recommit myself to writing my stories; and the truly fan-damn-tastic news is I intend to share them with YOU – all my fellow “sickos” – my fellow comrades of misery.   

Hugs & Kisses, 

DR. Wiseass ~
 not a real doc; just a real wise ASS!