Invisible NOT Imaginary!

When I was a little girl, I had this friend named Dee-Dee.  Actually I spelled her name DD because I was too young to spell at the time & didn’t understand vowels, but I did understand the alphabet.  Anyway, DD was INVISIBLE, mostly because she was my IMAGINARY friend.  Actually that’s the only reason she was invisible, but I digress.

IMAGINARY friend, "DD"
Image courtesy of Pixabay.com 

I think I invented DD because I wanted a sister, but GOD gave me a little annoying brother instead.  I also wanted a best friend, but when you’re too young to pour your own cereal, nevertheless, drive a car – creating a social life that would secure you a best friend was next to impossible.   But I have a terrific imagination, so DD was born! 

I can’t recall how long DD was an integral part of my daily life – probably until I went to kindergarten and made real flesh-n-bones friends.  Of course, I don’t think I made any best friends in kindergarten because I can’t remember any of their names.   As I recall, it wasn’t until 2^nd grade that I made a best friend.  Hey – I was a ‘late-bloomer’ in the friendship department, what can I say?  Besides – I was terribly shy.  (I know that’s probably difficult for some of you to believe!)

But one day – whenever it was - DD just disappeared.  I guess I didn’t need her anymore.

In spite of my late start, I did learn how to make & become good friends with many a girl…and a few fellas, too.  In the past I’ve actually prided myself on my ability to BE a good friend.  In the past, I never imagined I’d have an actual shortage of friendships.  But now I do.

I’m fairly certain it’s because I got sick.   Not just temporary snotty mucous-kind of sick, but chronically sick, as in “there’s-no-visible-symptoms-so-some-folks-(former-friends)-don’t-believe-me-AND-there’s-really-no- cure-for-this-shit-but-there-are-several-(mostly-expensive)-things-I-can- throw-at-my-symptoms-even-though-I’ll-still-feel-like –hell-most-of-the-time” kind of sick.  Because there’s no tangible qualities to the many illness labels I’ve managed to collect over the years, some people have thought of me as a melodramatic hypochondriac.  Can you believe that?  What assholes!   

This lack of tangible quality that my ailments lack places them in the category of “invisible illness”.  Now I know what some of you might be thinking.  Invisible = Imaginary.  NO!  If you are one of those folks that just had that thought – might I gently suggest that perhaps you are an asshole, too?  If so, here’s your chance to reclaim your status as an anti-asshole, so read on.

With regard to atoms, microbes & illness -- invisible is NOT synonymous with imaginary.

With a nod of thanks to Louis Pasteur and Robert Koch, ‘germ theory’ was developed as far back as 1870.  SO - I think it’s fair to say that most people believe in the existence of bacteria these days, and its well they should because bacteria are everywhere.  In fact – for reasons unclear to me, back in 1998 some microbiologists in Georgia decided to count them all.   (I’ll bet it’s more of an estimate, don’t you?) 

Their conclusion?  There are 5,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 bacteria on earth; that’s fifty million trillion trillion!!  You’d think with a group numbering that large that you’d be able to see those lil bastards, wouldn’t you?    Alas, they are INVISIBLE to the naked eye – but they AREN’T imaginary!

From that bigass number, there are some nasty buggers that cause disease.  Some of those diseases cause outward symptoms – some don’t.   That’s the main difference between a ‘visible’ and ‘invisible’ disease.    Another important note is that most invisible health conditions are considered chronic conditions (and vice versa). 

According to a study out by John Hopkins University, in the year 2005, nearly ½ of all Americans (133 million people) were living with some kind of chronic condition, regardless of age, race or economic status.   Of that number, nearly 24% had 2 or more chronic conditions, the prevalence of which increased with age and according to gender.   By far, women suffer from more multiple chronic conditions than men do.    I have no idea why that is so, but it certainly seems a bit unfair, don’t you think?

Chronic health conditions influence individual’s lives in unique ways, initial impact beginning with physical & mental health, influencing employment status, and even the relationships & social life that patients hold most dear.    The reason for this is because chronic illness affects everyone differently; some are barely affected at all, while others face actual disability.

This disparity of experience contributes to the overall perception of invisible, chronic illness because even those with the same illness tend to make judgments about others, thinking if other patients complain about their symptoms more than they do – they must certainly be attention-seeking hypochondriacs.  Yes, we live in such a judgmental society, so quick to draw conclusions about others & cast aspersions upon their character.   

For example, every arthritis sufferer experiences their own unique pain and within a particular range of severity.   For some people whose experience is on the lower end of the pain scale, it is difficult for them to truly understand the crippling, disabling experience of those suffering at the opposite end of the spectrum.   Although I feel blessed that my own (Lyme disease) arthritis pain is nowhere near the most severe part of the continuum, I have still been ridiculed by my own (extended) family members whose arthritis experience is different than my own.  It’s strange, but there seems to be some validity to that age-old ‘competition’ of “whose bruise is the most blue.”

Photo courtesy of
Teerapun/freedigitalphotos net.

In addition to being strangely competitive and judgmental, our society seems rather committed to the idea that “seeing is believing.”  Combined, these attitudes only seem to reinforce the ignorance and misunderstandings which thrive regarding both chronic & invisible illness.

But here’s another eye-opening statistic:  Of the 133 million Americans dealing with chronic illness, a whopping 96% are considered “invisible” conditions.   Also out of that 133 million Americans, 25% of them have some kind of activity limitation – ranging from mild limitations all the way to complete disability.  

Perhaps the most startling statistics come from the website www.invisibleillnessweek.com, a site committed to bringing awareness about the conditions & diseases which can overwhelm and devastate the lives of millions upon millions of Americans,  suggest that 26 million people are considered to have a SEVERE disability, although of that number, only 7 million people actually use some kind of assistive technology, such as a cane, wheelchair, etc. that would visually indicate a disability is present.    Therefore, my rudimentary math skills tell me that 19 million people are severely disabled without any visual cues providing the “proof” for all those naysayers in our society that ‘must see to believe’.  If you ask me, that’s a helluva lot of severe INVISIBLE disability!

DR.Wiseass LOVES cake!

In all honesty, after years of illness – I do finally have some kind of visual aid to give witness to the diseases and conditions that plague me.  Because of the auto-immune version of hypothyroidism (Hashimoto’s disease) that almost destroyed my metabolism, and because of the ongoing pain and fatigue of chronic Lyme disease that is so overwhelming it drastically limits my daily activities, making exercise a near impossibility most of the time -  I’ve become a rather large woman.  In spite of my therapist’s disapproval, I freely admit that I’m a big lard ass.    Yet, instead of people understanding that all my VISIBLE rolls of fat are indicative of years of debilitating illness, many just assume I’m (literally) twice the woman I once was because I must certainly be a big lazy-ass, and because I probably eat lots of cake.   Some days I can handle those attitudes which serve to reflect the cruelty & stupidity of others; but other days it just makes me want to curl up into a little ball and do my best to become invisible myself.

Unfortunately, such negative attitudes towards those with invisible chronic illness run rampant – at least for now.  Therefore, we must continue building solidarity with our fellow ‘sickos,’ acknowledging the overwhelming ignorance of our fellow man, followed by our own heart-searching decisions to ultimately forgive them for ‘they know not what they do’.   Hopefully one day, we can eradicate such destructive & hurtful attitudes if we continue to reach out & teach our fellow citizens about the conditions that cause us such affliction, and even disabilities. 

Unlike my invisible and imaginary childhood friend, DD, the chronic illnesses which are my enemies, such as LD, CFS, FMS, IC, IBS, PFD, OAB, etc. – they may all be INVISIBLE, but they are most definitely not IMAGINARY! 

Until next time...

Hugs & Kisses,

DR. Wiseass

 ~NOT a real doc; just a real wise ASS!


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